Death; and all that's unsaid

Gone, but what does gone exactly mean,
does it mean i cant hear you
or that I just wont see,
all the expressions you make
when i share stories,
I wish you could hear everything thats news today,
everything I've wished I could tell you,
I never had the guts to say-
I'm sorry if you thought i didnt know you loved me enough,
I'm sorry if you didn't hear me right,
I'm sorry if you didnt know you meant the world
to someone who prayed for you every single night.
I lost my faith years ago
and I wish I were strong enough to believe,
fairytales and all the beautiful make believes,
God maybe has a plan for me
but perhaps its to question it all,
and season after season summer turns to fall,
I recognize my triumphs,
I recognize my loss,
but maybe i'm not destined to ever have it all.
If you could see me now,
I wonder if you'd be proud
of the person you created
and the person you forgot.